Breaking Through Obstacles: A 4-Step Formula AudioChapter from Built For Stealth AudioBook by Scott Allan

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Built for Stealth. Key Principles for Building a Great Life. Written by Scott Allen. Narrated by Russell Newton. “History has demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their defeats." — B. C. Forbes Obstacles are barriers that stand between you and the fulfillment of your dreams. To get from where you are today to the place you desire to be in the not-too-distant future, you will have to face life’s challenging roadblocks along the way.

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Most of these obstacles can be overcome with a few simple strategies. More difficult challenges require an advanced approach. This could be a shift in personal values, the adoption of new beliefs, or developing a deeper level of wisdom and mindfulness. In some cases, therapy is required to overcome issues that may be blocking you from reaching your goals. If you are serious about achieving your dreams and are willing to go to any lengths, you will endure difficulties in which courage and confidence is challenged, beliefs are questioned, and unresolved trauma is confronted. In this place of fear and uncertainty, you will have to face the most terrifying obstacle of all: yourself. You must prepare yourself to dig in and push through the problems blocking your direct path to freedom. Only by facing obstacles will you be able to make progress. Unfortunately, many people falter as soon as they hit the first wall and realize there’s no instant solution that can solve their problems.

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An obstacle is blocking your path and appears insurmountable. Unless you can find a way to get past this hurdle, you will always be stuck by challenges that appear larger than you. When you find yourself at this crossroad, remember there is no problem or difficulty too complex that cannot be resolved. Your success in any situation is measured by your performance in working through problems. If there is a way to avoid dealing with the problem, your first instinct may be to disregard it, bury it, or try to pass it on to someone else. Either way, you will only seek to defeat yourself. That which you do not confront is unresolved. Even if it is resolved by someone else, this won’t help you grow. You must take care of your own weeds in the garden. They are still your weeds—even if someone else pulls them out. When you pass the buck to someone else, instead of making a real effort to solve the situation, you end up disempowering yourself. You are doing the other person a favor by giving them the opportunity to solve what you passed on. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help but be intentional in conquering your own issues.

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Life’s obstacles present an opportunity to strengthen yourself and become more confident as you defeat your own limitations. One of the greatest measures of successful people is their ability to transcend life’s difficulties and overcome the roadblocks that threaten to hold them back. Successful people stand up to challenges that threaten their goals and dreams. External and Internal Obstacles “Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow." — Ronald E. Osborn I have divided obstacles into two categories: external and internal. We largely create circumstances in our lives through our emotion, thought, action, interaction with people, and the quality of our relationships.

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The problems we create because of our direct influence are called internal obstacles. The other set of obstacles is external, and in most cases, has nothing to do with us directly. However, we may be connected to such obstacles, not by choice but by duty or responsibility to seek solutions. External Obstacles External obstacles are the unpredictable events thrown in your path when you least expect them. They are created by the situations, circumstances, and natural events that are beyond your control. Whether it is a global crisis that starts on the opposite side of the world or an ill family member who needs your immediate attention, external obstacles challenge your ability to deal with a situation that is not entirely of your own making. There is very little you can do to prevent these things from happening. However, you can do everything in your control to make the circumstances more favorable. This could mean reaching out to someone who really needs your help. Or, being pulled into a situation either at work or at home where a problem exists, and you are expected to provide a successful outcome for other parties. You may not have created a particular problem, but you could still be a part of the solution.

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When a situation that you didn’t create arises, instead of responding with fear or by deciding it’s “not my problem,” condition yourself to adopt a different approach. Consider this a valuable opportunity to step up and take charge. If you feel afraid of the problem, let yourself feel that fear. Take direct action in the face of what frightens you. Your fearful emotions do not have to control your actions. You can control your emotions by doing something. You can respond to any situation. If you choose to disregard a certain problem, it will continue to exist. The best time to determine how to deal with an obstacle is when it stands between you and all your hopes and dreams. You may face a situation in which you’re asked to find a solution to a problem, and others could be looking to you for guidance. Regardless of whether the problem is a situation in your company, at home, or in a personal relationship, always ask yourself the following: What can I do in this situation?

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How can I make a difference here? What actions could I take right now that everyone else is avoiding? These questions create a higher level of personal empowerment as you start to think about possible solutions. When you seek solutions to obstacles keeping you stuck, you empower yourself. When you rely on someone else to figure out the answers, you empower them. If you work together to overcome a barrier, you empower each other. You can develop new methods and solutions for tackling these barriers when they appear and pose as obstacles in your path. External obstacles include things such as the decisions of others and how they impact you, global economic crisis, war, natural disasters and illness.

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You can decide how to handle the situation. Will you let it influence you in a negative manner, draining your energy day after day as the circumstances of the world shape your future? Instead, will you take action to seek out a solution to make the best of the situation at hand? You always have a choice, in any situation, to do something. Take the lead when you have to and step back to let others deal with the crisis when that’s the best thing to do. As long as you are aware of the difference, you can decide either way. Internal Obstacles Internal obstacles are problems or conditions that are created through your direct involvement. It may be a situation arising from an unresolved issue, a difficult relationship, or a crisis related to work. These obstacles can be very threatening because of the personal emotional ties we have to them. With external obstacles, it is much easier when you can acknowledge that you had nothing to do with creating this situation. But personal obstacles are more emotional and tied closely to your feelings of rejection and failure. We all face countless internal obstacles.

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Many of these obstacles are small and harmless, so they go unnoticed. Other obstacles, however, may take over our lives. If they are not controlled or removed, their manifestation could make you miserable. These self-defeating behaviors grow from within and threaten to destroy you. They harm you spiritually and negatively influence your confidence and your ability to take a proactive stance. If they aren’t confronted, they act like slow poison. When this happens, we become powerless, foolish, and fatigued. In our efforts to avoid pain and suffering caused by obstacles created by our self-defeating behaviors, we may turn to other methods of escapism (drugs, alcohol, excessive shopping) to relieve our suffering inflicted by this internal enemy. Internal obstacles include things like addictions, grief, trauma, negative thinking and more. Obstacles that are hidden from view are the most difficult to overcome. Our greatest enemy is within us and remains elusive until strong intervention measures are taken. Once you have confronted your greatest fears, you will have taken the first step to victory. The stranglehold that these problems have on your life will be defeated and the pathway to a new way of living will appear before you. This is your pathway to freedom. When you face your greatest trial with courage and faith, you are free to walk this path. Facing your fears and personal demons gives you great strength. When you refuse to be defeated, the chains that bind you are released. Whether you have an addiction, or you habitually think negatively, the power to change these behaviors lies within you. In the end, you are only as weak as you believe yourself to be. Obstacles Have a Five-Fold Purpose “Happiness is dependent on self-discipline. We are the biggest obstacles to our own happiness.

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It is much easier to do battle with society and with others than to fight our own nature." — Dennis Prager An obstacle is not a roadblock; it is a necessary element that serves a purpose. Obstacles help us grow. We tend to think problems will prevent us from moving ahead. Instead, it is by developing solutions to overcome challenges that the greatest growth is achieved. Here are five reasons why obstacles matter and why we should embrace them as tools that can help us evolve. 1. Obstacles contribute to growth and development. Develop the attitude that every challenging situation carries an opportunity for you to become stronger. Create a deeper awareness of why this particular problem has come into your life.

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It is important to acknowledge that obstacles exist to enable us to evolve and make progress. This builds character, boosts courage, and gives you a deeper feeling of satisfaction once you have effectively worked through a difficult period. 2. Obstacles serve to increase self-confidence and boost self-esteem.

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We feel a sense of deep fulfillment by overcoming challenges. This increases confidence and strengthens the belief that nothing is impossible. Instead of being powerless, you become empowered. You develop a strong character. With every victory, your confidence moves up a notch, making you less fearful of the future. Remember that most people fail because they don’t believe in themselves, not because they lack ability. 3. Meeting new challenges expands opportunities. You can become the master of problem-solving only by facing adversity and the things in life that oppose your ideals or chosen path.

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Your greatest challenge is to deal with difficult people or unpleasant situations. These challenges give you an opportunity to become something today that you weren’t yesterday, to face problems and find solutions. Your greatest victory lies in facing your deepest fears. 4. Overcoming obstacles puts us in line with our life’s purpose. Dealing with obstacles aligns us with things that are important in our lives. What appears to be a roadblock is actually a tool for enhancing focus and bringing us back to the path that leads to fulfillment. Meet challenges head on, find solutions, and when you can’t find the answers you’re looking for right away, take the time to explore other possible solutions. Weigh your decisions carefully. Brainstorm options. Meditate and focus on whatever has led you to this place. Perceive every challenge as a stepping stone to a new level of awareness that draws you closer to your purpose, enabling you to stay on track. Once you have managed to effectively remove a roadblock, it becomes a part of your life. You don’t just throw it away and forget about it. Instead, forge a relationship with each victory. The obstacles in your life have a purpose and, once you have faced them and effectively handled the situation, your life’s purpose become clearer. 5. Obstacles serve as your greatest teachers. Obstacles are not necessarily hindrances designed to cause failure. However, your perception of a significant problem or misfortune in many cases is disillusioned. The obstacle that stands in your way serves as your greatest teacher. You learn the deepest lessons in life by facing the situations that challenge you and by overcoming these opposing forces.

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Remember that the tougher the challenge, the greater the reward and more valuable the lesson. Facing the Thirty-Foot Wall When faced with a situation that we don’t know how to deal with, the initial instinct is to react with negative resistance. We approach the solution from an angle of powerlessness. You may say things like, “Well, it’s not my problem! I had nothing to do with this!” or catch yourself complaining about the situation and coming up with reasons why it happened, how it could have been avoided, and who is to blame. Complaining is always a complete waste of resources. It only adds to the problem and offers nothing in exchange. Complaining about something or someone only makes the situation more unbearable for both the complainer and the people listening to them. You may think that you are getting something off your chest or releasing your frustration surrounding a particular incident, but if you carefully observe how you feel afterward, you’ll probably realize that you feel even more stressed and angry. Nothing will have been resolved. Only negative emotions would have been unleashed. Many of the ways that we deal with problems are based on our experiences, traumas, and old ways that support our limiting beliefs.

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When we don’t know what to do, we react based on old methods that no longer work. We tend to fall into our old patterns, especially when it comes to problem solving, as a means of dealing with our own fears and insecurities. We resist the problem until it becomes someone else’s problem or is buried under all the lies we tell ourselves. One of the first things we tend to do is label the problem with a negative attitude. If it is a person, we come up with damaging labels for them. Labeling something attaches the blame to a person or situation. However, labeling not only disempowers the person being labeled, it also disempowers you. If a difficult situation arises, avoid the labeling game. For many people, their first reaction is to strap a label on the problem and walk away. They distance themselves from the obstacle as if to say, “There, I just took care of it. Next?” When faced with a challenge, focus on controlling your initial reactions to the problem. Instead of picking up the phone and launching a complaint session, think of effective solutions you could try to make the situation better. Instead of reacting negatively and saying there is no solution, first identify exactly what the difficulty is, and then mind map the solutions to reach a conclusion.

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Try to find solutions to everything. Take time to think things through. Brainstorm ideas and talk with people positively instead of labeling or gossiping. This is “obstacle avoidance,” and it is the most unproductive approach you can take. Perceive every problem as an opportunity to expand your growth. Listen to what your emotions are telling you and not your mind. The mind is full of ego and rarely works to resolve anything when left to its own devices. When you follow your heart in any situation, everything will be the better for it. The Formula: A Four-Step Process “Concern yourself more with accepting responsibility than with assigning blame. Let the possibilities inspire you more than the obstacles discourage you." — Ralph Marston There is an effective formula or process that can be applied to almost any challenging situation or difficulty you are facing. When confronted with a problem that seems too big to conquer, you can find a way to overcome it by using the four-step process below. 1. Identify the obstacle.

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Describe the obstacle in one sentence. Do you want to buy a house, but you don’t have enough money? Do you have to speak with your boss about a problem with your work? Is your son or daughter experiencing a problem at school and they need your help? Are you working on a project that is over budget and behind schedule? No matter what the situation is, the first step to working toward a solution is to identify it. Write it out on paper to make it real. Don’t keep anything in your head and try to work it out. That’s the worst place for a challenge to exist. Then, once you have identified the problem with absolute clarity.… 2. Mind map potential solutions. Now that you have clearly defined the obstacle, it is easier to draw ideas on what actions to take. For the second step, create a “branch of ideas,” or a mind map of possible solutions.

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By putting your ideas to paper, you can see with greater clarity the solution to overcoming your obstacles. People get stuck when they hold those ideas in their head. The mind has a way of latching onto a problem and making it bigger by focusing on the problem instead of the way out. You can now write in point form as many possible solutions as you can think of. 3. Select the best choice. Next, from the list of options, choose the best one. Write down the best solution and work toward taking immediate action. It may be that the obstacle requires several solutions. In this case, you can prioritize the options in the order of importance. Take direct action on the first choice and once complete, move to the next possible solution on your list.

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Keep working through it until you have successfully overcome the problem. 4. Follow up on the outcome. After applying the formula to your situation, you may not have an immediate outcome. The application of your solutions may take time to work. The final stage is to follow up on the results. Did you get the outcome you wanted? Did you experience a different result than what you expected? If you didn’t get what you were hoping for, continue to apply other solutions.

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Just because something didn’t deliver the first time doesn’t mean the situation is hopeless. For every obstacle you face, there is a way to overcome it. Action Plan 1. What obstacles are holding you back right now? Do you have a plan for getting past them? Apply the above formula to help you develop solutions. 2. Everyone has at least one self-defeating behavior that challenges them. Write down your self-defeating behavior and the steps you plan to take to overcome this behavior. 3. Create a mind map of solutions for this scenario and put your ideas into action. 4. Next, write down an internal obstacle you’re currently facing. Subsequently, think about this obstacle and brainstorm solutions. 5. Write about an external obstacle you had to face. Were you successful in dealing with it? If so, how did you do it? If not, what would you have done differently?

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This has been Built for Stealth. Key Principles for Building a Great Life. Written by Scott Allen. Narrated by Russell Newton.

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Copyright: 2022